I am not sure if we as parents can ever understand children. I came across these two distinct scenarios recently:
- One evening last week, I was sitting on a park bench watching people. There were two kids playing while their mothers were deeply engrossed in some conversation on the adjacent bench. I was watching the kids. One was about 2 years old and other was about 4 years and they were playing with some toys. There was a bat the elder one had and the younger one wanted it. After a while the older boy wanted it back and he refused to give. They started quarrelling over it.
The mother of the younger one suddenly shouted “Kiran,(that was his name) don’t dominate”. The children seem to take no notice of it and slightly irritated, she gets up walk to her son and says very firmly “I told you not to dominate”. The children froze for a while; I guess they figured out something was wrong perhaps.
After few moments, they were playing again as if nothing happened and their mothers were silent.
- My daughter drew a picture of baby Cinderella and was showing to my neighbor as I reached home. The neighbor asked her to draw a young Cinderella and show them. My daughter says “It’s is difficult to draw a young Cinderella. You know why? She is too big and will not fit in to the paper”.
I didn’t understand this. We came in side and she was busy drawing a young Cinderella. I was surprised to see a large portrait of Cinderella covering the whole paper. I understood what she had said earlier. Even before she drew the picture, she had actually seen it and she knew it was very big!
We constantly try to make our children like us: logical, informed and prepared for success. But we seldom realize what we are taking away from them.
No wonder, deep inside we all long to go back to our childhood…