This post is related to the one on fighting depression. I believe, every human being has a strong need to feel “High” at times. Some common examples I can think of are : Someone appreciating me for something I have done , Someone expressing gratitude towards me , accomplishing something after some good effort, just getting lucky…
There are the bigger “Highs”. I think we need to have some of them intermittently to really start loving your life. It’s there fore important to have hobbies, learn something new, connect with people, involve in social activities, set goals in your life and put effort to achieve them, celebrate your success etc.
If life seems monotonous, it’s partly because the “High” is missing (just reflect, when was the last time you had a High in life?)
For creative people, I think the need is higher, because typically creativity looks for appreciation.
While for some people, the High is just a personal thing (doesn’t depend on others – this definitely needs a higher state of mind), but for most it’s got to do with other people around us.
If you are in the process of transforming your life, it’s very important to find out what gives you the real genuine “High”. Identify what gives you the High and put things in place to make sure you have it often. Here are some examples:
- If you get High when someone appreciates you, then start appreciating others. The moment you start it, see how others will return it
- If achieving something hard gives you that high, set tough goals for you. Achieve it and celebrate…
- If you have creative talents in life, take them out. Do a painting and show off to people, write a story …
What is described above is rather straightforward. But have you wondered, why does this not occur to us naturally? I think that’s because at a different level, in our daily lives, there is a constant need for those small “highs”. They slowly reinforce the patterns and form your personality. Once we have those small ‘highs’ in our daily life, in whatever we do, the ‘bigger Highs’ is just a natural extension of it.
But then what prevents us from having those small Highs? Some possibilities:
- We are too busy and caught up with life, we do not have time. We are not aware of what we are doing.
- We falsely associate highs with material gains (which is not really genuine I would say, Ask yourself – If the feeling you get by watching a sunset the same as the feeling you get when you made some profit in the stock market? You might argue both are essential, I too agree. But the point I am trying to drive here is that choose those things that touch your soul, not your mind..)
- We are not true to ourselves. We have been trying to fit in to different roles in life, moving away from our natural state of being. We don’t realize this initially, but at some point you suddenly realize that there is no purpose in life, it’s so boring.. Mostly by then, you do not have the urge to come back; you rather just resign.
So the point is , if you are able to bring these small “Highs” in to your life, naturally the bigger ones will follow. Now how can you get these small “highs” in your life? Some examples here:
- Enjoy what you do, put your head where your heart is
- Slow down in life, don’t keep chasing one after the other . Have breaks between activities
- Maintain good relationships, communicate cheerfully with people, appreciate them..
- Plan your day, accomplish what you planned..
- Spend time for reflection, develop gratitude in life…
- Cultivate Mindfulness in life
You might want to look at your own life and see where those Highs are. Get them back. It could just be that you have a photo of your kid on your office desk, as you glance your heart is filled with love, joy and affection for a short moment. That will do.
Getting this high is going to be your biggest aid when you are trying to change your life, especially getting rid of bad habits like smoking. Without you realizing, these habits give you a false illusion of ‘High’ which you are going to miss when you try escape. If you understand this and ensure that you have real genuine “highs” in life, you can get rid of any habits without any issues. If you are apprehensive, look at all those who quit smoking (without really undergoing months of misery & depression) easily have started something that they loved which actually gave them the high –be it a marathon runner, be it a social worker whatever it is.
This is the key to saying No to your habits….